The Dom Sub Living BDSM and Kink Podcast
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The Dom Sub Living BDSM and Kink Podcast
New BDSM Trends and Predictions for 2024
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#013: Stay ahead of the curve with our latest BDSM insights! As the kink community evolves, what new trends are emerging? Listen as host Alesandra discusses exciting trends in the community and offers valuable predictions for the upcoming year. Staying informed on the evolving trends in BDSM will help you on your journey to becoming the best Dom or sub you can be.
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It's it's going to be a very tricky time. And it does kind of feel like we're we're backtracking in a lot of ways. But um I think sometimes the pendulum swings. And so maybe we'll go the other way and things will start getting more and more accepting online and in real life. Welcome to the Dom Subliving podcast, where you'll learn how to break free from the vanilla rat, unlock your true potential as a dominant or submissive, and finally make BDSM a lifestyle. I'm your kinky guide, Alessandra. So I wanted to do something a little different today and do kind of a State of the Union address for BDSM because I've been in the lifestyle for over a decade. I've seen a lot of changes, and it's it's kind of my job to kind of be on top of all these things and just experience them. And then I get to report back to to you and kind of show you what's going on in the world of BDSM. And I've seen a lot of new trends starting to emerge in the BDSM and Kink community. Some of them are really fun and interesting, and some of them are kind of scary, I'm not gonna lie. So I'm going to be sharing some of my predictions for the coming year, too, some things I think we're gonna see more of, um, where I see things kind of heading, and that way you'll be able to say that you heard it all here first. But before we begin, I want to give you something to make your journey into the world of Dom Sub Dynamics and BDSM even easier. It's my free resource library, and it includes access to dozens of BDSM resources like videos, quizzes, workbooks, worksheets, guides, and you can redeem all of that for free at DomSubliving.comslash free. So the first trend I've been seeing, and I think we're gonna see a whole lot more of in the coming year is this huge explosion with AI or artificial intelligence. AI has crept into all aspects of our life. I'm sure you've seen it in the news. So it just makes a lot of sense that we're going to start seeing it more into in the BDSM world and just how it's creeping its way into that. And if you haven't played around with tools like ChatGPT, I I highly recommend it. It is a lot of fun, but you can use these AI tools even in your BDSM life. So you can use it for things like creating scenes and you can be really specific to you know, tailoring it for DDLG or, you know, sharing all the tools you have. Like if you have a flogger or a writing crop or a paddle, um, you can be really specific. You can say how long you want it to go, um, you know, if it's in a bedroom or if it's in a dungeon. Another thing you can use AI for um in terms of BDSM is creating your contract. Again, you can kind of give it some parameters of like how long you want your relationship to be, what your roles are, like if you're master slave, and um have AI create this wonderful BDSM contract for you. Unfortunately, um, with this technology and when it comes to all forms of technology, we're already we're already seeing a lot of censorship happening here. So even with Chat GPT, if you try to get graphic and sometimes even if you just mention BDSM, it'll tell you that it's not able to um do the thing that you want it to do because it's violating its terms and things like that. Um some tools I've noticed are better than others in embracing BDSM as an actual relationship dynamic. Um, and some give better advice than others. So always take what you are getting from AI with a grain of salt. But it has been kind of interesting to see how we can use um AI in the BDSM world. One thing me and my Dom are using it for, or he he actually got this idea, and it is is super, super cute. And I'm gonna share an example for you. But um, because our our relationship does have aspects of DDLG. So one thing he he got the bright idea to do is to ask ChatGPT to write a bedtime story for me. And he gets very specific, um, gives it my name, my stuffy's name. So if you don't know, I have a stuffy that is Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh. That is my stuffy. Um he's my best friend. So um, and then another thing is I really love Disneyland. We we actually live pretty close to Disneyland, so we do go a lot. And so he has Chat GPT write me bedtime stories. Um, and I'm gonna give you an example of how like cute and how you can make it really specific. But so this is a bedtime story that um I'm just gonna tell you the beginning of it. I'm gonna leave you on a cliffhanger with it, but it's super, super cute. In the heart of Disneyland, Alessandra, a bright-eyed girl, roamed the bustling streets with her gloomy friend Eeyore the donkey. The colorful sights and cheerful sounds at the park couldn't quite lift Eeyore's spirits, but Alessandra was determined to change that. Come on, Eeyore, let's explore and find some magic, she urged. With a heavy sigh, Eeyore reluctantly followed. As they ventured through the park, Alessandra's laughter echoed, while Eeyore trotted along with a perpetual frown. Their journey led them to Sleeping Beauty's castle, where Alessandra suggested, maybe we'll find an adventure in this enchanted place. But Eeyore responded in his typical gloomy tone, I doubt it, but go ahead. So that was part of a story from Chat GPT, and um you can create your own stories with your own um your own name or the name of your own little um you can put in a stuffy or a friend, give it a place, give it a problem. Um, one thing that um my Dom actually did to even make it even more custom was one day I was I wasn't feeling good. So he had it be that um I was having a tummy ache at Disneyland and that Eeyore had to cheer me up. Um, so you can get really specific and it'll just pop out a bedtime story if you're you know getting tired of the same stories that um you're reading as a little or that you're reading to your little. I know me and Jay have read The Runaway Bunny like a million times, but so chat GPT and AI is a great way to kind of customize your own little stories if you're into um age play or DGLG or anything like that. And I just want to put that disclaimer again that just like any other tool, you really want to be careful with AI, like I said. So there's good things about um these tools. There's some not so good uses for these tools. So just always be mindful of that. And like I said, any information you get about BDSM on there, take it with a grain of salt because there has been things that have been wrong. Um, even advice it's given has given like not accurate advice. So um play around with it, you know, use it for fun, but definitely don't, you know, use it as your go-to source for education. So the next trend I've been seeing, and I think we're gonna see more of, is just more censorship online and in real life. And I kind of alluded to that with the AI apps not wanting to generate kink content. But I think just with everything going on in the world, and I'm trying not to paint a doom and gloom picture, but I do think we're gonna see more censorship. I think a lot of times we take as a society kind of like, you know, two steps forward, three steps back type of thing. Um this last year in 2023, you know, Elon Musk with Twitter and you know, Mark Zuckerberg with Meta has been really, really crazy as far as what us as BDSM educators can do online. And even though a lot of these apps and things like Twitter or X or whatever you're calling it these days, you know, has tried to be proponents of free speech, it seems like they're they have their version of what free speech is. And so I think it's gonna be harder to find education for BDSM and Kink online, and there's just gonna be more and more censor censorship. We're gonna have to get even more creative about how we word things and spell things, and um, it's going to just be a really big challenge. And the other like real crazy thing, again, I'm trying not to scare you or paint this really like um apocalyptic picture, but you know, there are stories and cases of people getting fired from their jobs um, from what they are doing online. And even though we have organizations like the National Coalition of Sexual Freedom, and they have made great strides in um rights for kinksters, I think we're still gonna be getting some pushback, you know, especially as things like OnlyFans become more and more popular, that um we're just gonna see this retaliation from more conservative groups. And unfortunately, I'm already seeing a lot of that. Um, like I said, hearing people about people who have lost their jobs for things that they've posted or done as you know, a consenting adult, even in the comforts of their own home. And so it's it's going to be a very tricky time. And it does kind of feel like we're we're backtracking in a lot of ways, but um, I think sometimes the pendulum swings, and so maybe we'll go the other way and things will start getting more and more accepting online and in real life. I do hope that BDSM is almost seen as like this alternative lifestyle or alternative relationship. So it does get more accepted in the community. And I think the more we as Kingsters normalize it and try not to hide it, I think um we will gain a lot of ground. But even though I am trying to be hopeful, I do think in some ways the trend will we'll see things get worse before it gets better. Because this year, 2024 is an election year. And unfortunately, it seems like things get uglier whenever it's an election year, um, at least here in the US. It seems like um anything and everything that can become an issue becomes an issue. Um, just like trans rights are being hugely attacked right now. It is so, so disgusting to see what's going on. Um, and we've seen historically that trans issues are kind of like the first domino to go. And then after that, it's LGBTQ plus rights that those start getting attacked, and then women's rights, and we we've already seen that happening. And so I think we're just going to see more of that on a bigger scale, or at least being discussed and debated. And I know, you know, at this point, sometimes people say don't bring politics into BDSM, but I'm sorry, if if you are a true Kingster, if you really, really consider yourself a practicer of BDSM, you know that there is no way to separate BDSM and politics. That BDSM is all about self-expression, sexuality, um, identity, and those are all things that are being dealt with in politics. So I really encourage you to vote this year. I think it is so, so important because what's at stake is really what people can do with their own bodies, freedom of speech, and just being able to live authentically. And in fact, um authentic, talking about authentic um living authentically, authentic, if you didn't know, is Merriam-Webster's word of the year. So I think we're going to also see a rise in people wanting to live authentically and not wanting to hide behind this like vanilla life that they've portrayed. So I think that's going to be another big trend is just people wanting to be who they are in whatever capacity that is, and being able to go to BDSM events and being able to just dress how they want and have the type of lifestyle they want. But again, on the flip side of that, I think we're going to be seeing politicians in the media, um, different social establishments, like, you know, schools in the workplace. I think we're going to see those wanting to just morally police people even more. So another another prediction I have is that the cost of living crisis is going to cause people to kind of rethink their kinky habits. And whether you're not, whether or not you think we are gonna have this cost of living crisis, or we're already in one, or we've been in one, you know, the economy goes up and down, and things are never cheap. And unfortunately, um, things are always going to get more and more expensive over the years, no matter, you know, who's in the White House or what's going on. It just seems like things are getting more and more expensive. We did see a boom in the popularity of BDSM during the pandemic. And then, you know, it seemed like everybody was stuck at home with their partners, and so they were getting bored and so wanting to do kinky things together. And so we did see that boom. Um, and then after the lockdowns were over, people were really excited to start doing these things in person and exploring BDSM in real life. And so as a result of that, people started spending a lot on gear and going to events. But I think because of the economy now, I think we're going to see less and less of that. Um, I think people are going to be cutting back on their spending of, you know, buying BDSM gear. Um, people are on a budget, so they're going to be choosing more affordable online events in courses instead of those in-person ones where like maybe you had to travel and get a hotel. And then plus, with like the cost of gas being so high, I think we're just gonna see less and less of people wanting to go to these bigger events and conventions. And this is just a shameless plug, but we have courses at Dom Sub Living that are starting as low as just $9. So definitely check those out at Dom Subliving.com slash courses if you are on a budget. So now for some of these more positive trends that I think we're gonna be seeing more of, and some of my predictions is I've been seeing kink being remarketed as more as sexual wellness or self-care. And so I think we're gonna see more of that. We've seen a little bit of that with sex toys starting to be sold more openly at stores like Sephora and Ulta and Target, and they're kind of rebranded as just sexual wellness or self-care, um, even in the way that they're they're marketed. It's not, you know, in this like kinky way. It's just more of like relaxation and taking care of yourself. And I think that will pave the way for BDSM even becoming more mainstream and you know, talking more about sexual wellness and self-care. And we're seeing more and more kink-friendly therapists. So I think BDSM is going to become more and more mainstream. And so, just like how even things like vibrators are becoming more like works of art, even that you can display on your nightstand and be proud of. I think we're gonna see more and more BDSM toys and gear kind of going that route too, just becoming these like works of art that you can display. And speaking of BDSM toys and gear, I think another trend we're gonna see is just seeing more non-binary or or gender-neutral things. Um, I think we're gonna see more clothing, more gear, more toys, just kind of more branded that way. Um, again, because of just the way sexual identity is evolving. And um I think we're gonna also see more non-binary titles being used in um power exchange. So instead of like the typical master or sir or mistress, I think we're gonna see more terms like your highness, your majesty, captain. So I think that is another trend we're gonna start seeing. And in relation to that, I think another trend is just seeing BDSM roles in general being more fluid. And I we definitely have our friends in the trans community to thank for this, um, just because we do see that it that gender and sexuality is a spectrum, and so it would make sense that um BDSM power exchange is the spectrum as well. And because gender is fluid, sexuality is fluid, so I think we're going to see a lot more people identifying as a switch than we did before. Um, and just more people like foregoing the typical dominant and submissive labels. Um, and I think that that could be a good thing because it means that people will be more open to exploring, experimenting, and just being more open about how they experience power exchange. So I think it's going to be a really, really good thing that we can see coming. So that was some of the trends I see coming in 2024 and some of my own personal predictions. So send me a message and let me know if you agree with them or disagree with them or if you have any predictions of your own. But hopefully I gave you some ideas and some food for thought for your own BDSM practice and for your own Dom Sub relationships. And if you need help getting started on your journey, remember I have that free resource library you can grab at Domsubliving.com/slash free. It includes access to dozens of BDSM resources like videos, quizzes, workbooks, worksheets, guides, and you can redeem all of that for free at DomSubliving.com slash free. I hope you enjoyed this episode. Thank you for joining me and being a part of the Dom Subliving community. You can check out all of the details and links for this episode in the description and show notes, and be sure to hit subscribe so you never miss an episode. But until next time, keep embracing your power and pleasure through Dom Subliving.